Marilyn Mason’s 10 top tips for humanists this festive season.
25 December and thereabouts has been a special time for celebrating with friends for thousands of years. Some would say that to overidentify the holiday we call ‘Christmas’ with Christian tradition, or to fret about that name, is a royal waste of time. Photo: Christmas Eve dinner by John McGinn.
One
Accept that Christmas Day is what we call 25 December and you’re not going to change that, any more that we humanists can rename Easter weekend, Eid, Divali, Passover… Enjoy the fact that it’s the one day of the year when almost everything is shut, you can’t shop, almost no one goes to work, the roads are empty… Relax.
Two
Send a card if you want to keep in touch with friends at this time of year — as many people still prefer a hand-written card to an email. But if you think they wouldn’t appreciate a physical card, send an e-card instead and give the money you would have spent on cards and postage to a worthy (secular) charity like the BHA (or wherever you like). If you want to support a charity and send a card to your loved ones, then a great way to do that would be to buy the from the BHA’s range at 80p a card (in packs of 10).
Three
Keep present-giving simple: give to those who need stuff, come to an agreement with those who don’t (which is most people past their youth). There is nothing particularly virtuous in buying things that people don’t need which will probably end up in a charity shop – you could cut out the middle-man and give the cash to charity instead.
Four
See friends and family when it suits you and them — don’t get too hung up on 25 December (remember Christmas is no big deal for humanists). Most people have several relatives they feel obliged to visit on Christmas Day – make life easier for them by opting out of the competition for their presence and see them another time.
Five
If you’re on your own over the holiday, just think — you can eat what you like, watch what you like on television, read a book, go to bed as early or late as you like… Relax.
Six
Eat, drink, and be merry, but pace yourself. You don’t have to drink alcohol at breakfast time or eat Christmas pudding, mince pies and Christmas cake all on the same day – or at all. You don’t have to cook or eat turkey or Brussel sprouts if you don’t like them. Admittedly this is harder when you are a guest, but tiny helpings may help!
Seven
Feed the birds, and enjoy watching them eat the inevitable leftovers
Eight
Go for a walk somewhere lovely on Christmas or Boxing or New Year’s Day — roads will be empty if you time it right, and few other people will be out. Be prepared to wish the few a Happy Christmas and New Year.
Nine
Take pleasure in in singing. Not all Christmas songs or carols are religious, and music of all kinds can be very uplifting.
Ten
Focus on enjoying yourself. Christmas can be a pleasantly sociable or self-indulgent time of year if you don’t get too caught up in the competitive consumerist rush. Relax.
Humanists might also enjoy Julian Baggini on giving to charity at http://www.theguardian.com/money/shortcuts/2014/nov/30/which-charities-should-i-support
Nothing will ever change if you tell yourself that it will never change. The change in the apparent path of the sun is the real reason for the celebration, why let the christian put the stamp of deception on it?
Merry Solstice to one and all!
The winter solstice festival, celebrated for millennia and purloined by Christians- claim it back and enjoy the season!
The winter solstice festival, celebrated for millennia and purloined by Christians- claim it back and enjoy the season everyone!
Wonderful list!!
Ugh! I thought I could escape from Xmas, but then I got involved with a man whose birthday is December 25th.
Happy Allanmas. We celebrate Allanmas in this house.
Plus keep bashing celebrators of Christmas whenever you get an opportunity. After all, that’s the core mission of Humanist’s Life, whether right or wrong.
Well, clearly that’s not true! Most humanists prefer to get on with their own lives.
“Plus keep bashing celebrators of Christmas whenever you get an opportunity. After all, that’s the core mission of Humanist’s Life, whether right or wrong.”
Sorry Jackal, this does not make sense. You sound so smug. Happy Christmas. I am now sprinkling virtual Holy Water on you.
Somebody wrote, “Axial tilt is the reason for the season.” I forget who said it, but it’s now a meme for me. For years I hated Xmas because my mother-in-law (with help from my father-in-law) totally ruined it. For her (and him as well) it was the perfect day to whine and complain about what a disappointment their son was and how the boy down the street gave his mother a much nicer gift, etc, and all the things wrong with us and how we’d failed to live up to their expectations, snif snif fuss fuss whine whine…
What is it about holidays that brings out the worst in some people? Thanksgiving was another day for us to go and put our tails between our legs in shame and listen to a litany of our faults.
Now the inlaws are long gone and I’m long divorced. I did escape Xmas only to find myself with Allanmas in its place. Can’t escape December 25th.
And now I find atheists and humanists and various non-believers creating nice celebrations, and I’m reclaiming the holiday season, thanks to axial tilt and Saturn. I’m celebrating the Saturnalia. I have a Saturnalia Tree outside (pine trees indoors are Germanic). And I have a small Festivus pole. Now I have to figure out how to stand it up.
What really restored Xmas for me was hearing Tim Minchin’s “White Wine in the Sun”. That has to be the most wonderful song evoking a loving and healthy family awaiting the arrival of their family members coming home. Secular people, happy together. (And of course it helps that Tim is from Australia where Xmas is a summer holiday…)
I’d like to enjoy the myth and magic of Father Christmas with my little one but feel strongly that instead of writing letters to him asking for toys and gifts that I’d like perhaps for my little one to receive something such as a letter from the big man with some more positive, moral, humanist messages to counteract all the consumerism that surrounds us all. Any tips for resources for enjoying this time of year with kids morally without losing any magic?
I am a Humanist and I enjoy telling people about Saturnalia and that the winter festival is nothing to do with religion however I do sort of disagree with this article. I feel that Christmas these days is more of a celebration of being with friends and family and having a good time. I like to make sure I have the full turkey with trimmings and christmas pudding, I like making the big day special and trying to fit everybody in and I really enjoy wishing everybody a Happy Christmas.
By remembering that the early christians adopted Saturnalia so that pagans would still keep their holidays (Jesus wasn’t even born in december) we can still take the original winter festival, include gift giving (that’s what they did in Saturnalia) and by mixing it up with european traditions (Father Christmas and indoor trees) we can all have a truly wonderful and I believe multicultural festival and still make the big day the 25th (Issac Newton’s birthday!). That way everybody wins.